13. Don't burn any bridges

As we journey through life we invariably encounter numerous difficulties and are often faced with some hard decisions. In working out these issues or problems we meet and deal with a lot of different individuals. Some of the interactions are positive and some not so much. If someone is not helpful or supportive, we might tend to attach blame to that party. Sometimes their response is determined by factors that you do not know, but we still tend to discard some people from our lives. That can lead to other problems.

When we dismiss other people over an unsatisfactory incident we call it burning our bridges. As a wartime analogy, when combatants retreated they would often burn bridges behind themselves to cut off their pursuers. It might have been an effective strategy during wartime but in most of our lives, it is not a good idea.

As an example, a friend of mine did not receive a promotion that he felt that he deserved. He was so upset that he resigned and left the organization bitter and unhappy. When he left he made a point of angrily expressing his feelings to a superior in the company. Of course, that did not hold him in good stead as he left. By coincidence, the person who was selected for the job declined the position, so it was again an open job. My friend had been the second choice, but after his tirade and bridge-burning outburst, he had in fact eliminated himself. 

We need to learn that as we travel through life everything is not going to go the way that we would have chosen or wished. We need to realize that we must handle the ups and downs with good manners and just continue to work hard. If we criticize or blame or offend others when we do not get what we want, we are just closing doors of opportunity on ourselves. When our feelings are hurt we need to quietly reflect and remember that there is always another day. 

If you burn bridges, not only does the rejected person suffer, we can also be burned by the fire!